7 (More) Tips for Managing Your Fucking Email

It's not the size of the inbox. It's how you use it.

Friends, based on the response to my post about getting to Inbox Zero, far too many of you are drowning in circle-backs, just-wanted-to-follow-ups, and expired Evites for parties you never even got around to RSVP-ing to because the summons were buried in an avalanche of pointless electronic correspondence.

Which is why today I come to you with SEVEN MORE TIPS—this time for managing all of the email you receive on an ongoing basis, not merely sorting and skedaddling the shit that was gathering cyber dust in your inbox before you implemented my easy 3-step method for cleaning it out.

(How’d that go, BTW? Let me know in the comments!)

We begin with a harsh truth, which is that apart from begging your dad to stop forwarding his daily “joke” digest, there’s not a whole heckuva lot you can do to control and significantly reduce the amount of email other people decide to send you.

Trust me, I’ve gone on those giddy “unsubscribe” streaks, convinced that my inbox would no longer be a receptacle for Overstock.com coupons just because I bought that ONE FUCKING RUG FROM THEM SEVEN YEARS AGO—and then they bought the bankrupt Bed, Bath & Beyond and somehow resurrected my email address from that system circa 2010, and apparently I am eligible for 60% off all housewares from now until eternity. Never mind the fact that BB&B does not deliver to the foreign country in which I now live. Details!

As such, today we’ll work on reducing inbox clutter in sneaky, effective ways you CAN control.

Because it’s not the size of the inbox, my gentle fucklings.

It’s how you use it.

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NFG Tip(s): Reining in your sending habits

First things first: if you SEND fewer emails, I guarantee you will RECEIVE fewer emails. This is just #FACTS. Here are three strategies from my book Get Your Shit Together to get you started.

1) Go all-inclusive

If you have a boss/coworker/client that you email regularly, try to condense your communiqués into one or two messages instead of five, six, or sixteen. If your question or notion isn’t time-sensitive, put it into a draft message that you add to all week and then send it all at once. This also helps you separate the wheat from the chaff—if you keep running drafts for your eyes only, then by Wednesday you might realize Monday’s question was stupid. Delete it, and nobody else will ever have to know.

2) Do it the old-fashioned way

Pick up the phone. Journey across the hall. Fire up the walkie-talkies. This makes for one less reply (or more) in your box, and it’s also usually much faster to have a single, live conversation with another human than it is to go back and forth over email—especially if you often waste valuable time trying to get your “tone” right in a typed missive.

Tone is a thing that comes across pretty fucking clearly right out of your mouth. Just sayin’.

3) That was not Rick James

Picture it: you’re procrastinating on a task, so you decide to reach out and cyber-touch a few pals for shits and giggles. You send three totally unnecessary emails—about the weather, the sale at LensCrafters, and the guy on your morning commute who could TOTALLY have been Rick James.

You spend two minutes composing each email and you receive three replies, which you then spend two more minutes (each) reading. Then you reply to all three of those (another two minutes each) because let’s face it, you’re still procrastinating.

You’ve now spent eighteen minutes having three different pointless email conversations, and you wonder why your inbox is swelling like pregnancy ankles in August?!

If this scenario sounds familiar, try applying a five-second rule to your online communications. That is, before you start typing, spend five seconds asking yourself:

Is this not only a waste of my time and precious inbox space, but also a waste of time/inbox space for whoever is on the other end of my itchy sending finger?

If the answer is a resounding yes, DO NOT SEND THAT EMAIL. There, I just saved you seventeen minutes and fifty-five seconds.

(PS: I hate to break it to you, but Ol’ Super Freak died in 2004. That was definitely not Rick James.)

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Next up: three more tips—this time for sending SHORTER and MORE EFFECTIVE emails—and one EXTRA-SPECIAL BONUS TIP that just might blow your mind.