No F*cks Given® Newsletter | 6.24.24
Solo travel, colonoscopies, theatre kids, and a new Fun Fact - this edition of the NFGN truly has it all.
Here we are again, my fabulous fucklings: the NFG Newsletter roundup is upon us, and per usual it contains great deals, fun links, book recs, and random AF musings from me to you.
HOUSEKEEPING:
This monthly dispatch is a free way to connect with my fans, let you know what I’m up to, and when there are new books, deals, etc. to report. If you’d like more from moi, you can upgrade to a paid subscription and receive weekly NFG tip emails, everything in the archives, AND access to the *new* private chat. We have fun.
What’s up?
It’s been a banner week in my household, with my husband going in for a double gum graft (OUCH) and me preparing for my first-ever colonoscopy (UGH). By the time you read this, I’ll be on the other end (HA) of that experience, but sadly the hubs will be eating pudding and protein shakes for the foreseeable.
(We’re back in New York City for this Summer o’ Medical Procedures, with a few other annoying-but-necessary adult body maintenance shenanigans on tap. There’s a lot to love about our adopted country of the Dominican Republic, but the healthcare system is…not tops on that list.)
Fortunately, we were able to get a lot of good eating in before I had to start on clear liquids only, including these gold standard French fries from No. 7 in Brooklyn. Thin, crispy, salty AF, and served in a bowl as big as my head.
NFG DEALS
Hear ye, hear ye! A new edition of Calm the Fuck Down just published in the UK and its environs—a sweet little £10.99 mass market paperback for easy toting to the park, the sea, or the countryside this summer. (Or perhaps just to the toilet?)
Get it from WH Smith Travel and High Street shops (←or online at WH Smith now for an additional 25% off), Waterstones, Amazon UK, Bookshop, and more.
This edition will also be available in the other territories controlled by my British publisher, so keep your eyes peeled Down Under as of June 25th…
What else?
Well. I sure am glad I didn’t get online a couple of weeks ago and rant about how unfair it is that Death and Other Details (starring Mandy Patinkin as “The World’s Greatest Detective” solving a locked-room murder aboard a glamorous private cruise ship) was cancelled after one season when the (to me) deeply underwhelming Only Murders in the Building keeps getting renewed and winning Emmys, because YOWZA, the boat show really jumped the proverbial shark in its last 3-4 episodes and I would have had to eat my words.
Turns out I know exactly why it wasn’t picked up for Season Two. Such promise, squandered! Sigh.
There were some great performances though, and at least I learned a new FUN FACT: Lauren Patten, the actress who plays the “Shiv Roy”-esque character on this show (and who, not for nothing, has a few extremely hot lesbian sex scenes therein) is the same person who performed this iconic number in the 1989 movie Teen Witch.
Top that!
[Correction: Because I am a dummy, I thought Lauren Patten was the actress in the above-linked video, which she clearly cannot be, because she is far too young to have starred in this movie. Thankfully, a kind reader has since pointed out that Patten was merely cast in the same role and recorded the song for Teen Witch: The Musical, the soundtrack for which was released in 2007, which makes vastly more chronological sense. You can listen to her version HERE. The NFGN regrets the error and remains committed to excellence in Fun Facts.]
In better whodunnit news: Andrew Scott, lately of Ridley, which, as loyal fucklings know, I loved, is joining the cast of the next Knives Out movie, a franchise I also love, despite Daniel Craig’s abysmal attempt at a Southern accent. He is just so hot and charming that I don’t care, and that’s saying something coming from someone who thought Rosamund Pike’s accent in Gone Girl was so atrocious that it ruined the entire movie.
And in “making time for me-time” news (Folks, I practice what I preach.): I have booked myself a five-day retreat in the Rockaways, about which I am practically giddy with anticipation.
In fact, when this edition of the NFGN lands in your inbox, I’ll be on my way out to Queens. I don’t drive, and I wanted to maximize my me-time without wasting a day on either end on air travel transit, so a subway to the beach it is…
Have you ever traveled alone, on purpose and with purpose? I haven’t, and I think I’m going to like it. For one, I have no compunction about eating by myself at a hotel bar; but I’m also looking forward to a little “holiday” without any actual plans.
The holiday for me is the break from planning, LOL.
Imma get up when I feel like it, seek out random snacks like a raccoon, have zero places to be at any particular time, be unworried and unbothered by any travel companions’ needs or preferences, and—hopefully—be able to use all of my best brain hours for a writing project that I’m working on, with no distractions or interruptions.
Or maybe I’ll say Fuck it and go to the pool for an Aperol Spritz. We shall see.
Book recommendations
As longtime subscribers know, I was a book editor myself for fifteen years and I like to use this newsletter to shout-out my recent favorite reads. I don’t take requests or PR trades or anything like that; whatever I recommend is because I truly enjoyed it and think other people will too.
I’ve read a lot lately, but I wanted to use this edition of the NFGN to highlight one wonderful book in particular, which also happens to have been written by my first-ever boss in New York City, who hired me as an editorial assistant for a comedy website in the summer of 2000 when I was 21 and I assumed he was 45 but he was really 26.
That man, now my friend of nearly a quarter century, has written a memoir that is brimming—BRIMMING, I TELL YOU—with his extraordinarily special brand of humor, heart, and captivating storytelling.
I present to you…
Set in New York City in the early aughts, Theatre Kids by
features a cast of misfits and drama dorks making their way in art and life, all while [sometimes knowingly, sometimes unknowingly] propping up their pal John, who is reeling from grief, Bourbon, and suboptimal romantic choices. Eventually, these loveable kooks (along with your humble narrator) will mount a four-hour off-off-Broadway adaptation of William Faulkner’s novel As I Lay Dying (for which they definitely did not have the rights) that takes place inside a giant wooden coffin (itself inside a black box theater). A real turducken of a production.Fewer than 100 people saw it, but that show probably saved John’s life.
Get your copy on Amazon, Bookshop, or wherever your purchase your seminal works of tragicomic mem-WAH! (Seriously, John is one of the finest and funniest writers I know, and if you were ever a theatre kid, or if you know and love a theatre kid, this book is for you all.)
LINKS & LIKES
I loved this piece on Pride and food and falling in love, by
I just found out about Trashie, an environmentally conscious way to get rid of your stuff (a favorite pastime of mine), knowing that it will be delivered to the most compatible new homes. Read about their innovative sorting and “matchmaking” processes here!
If you’re a workaholic, read this cautionary tale by
and then cash in some vacation days, stat.The best thing I learned this week. (Featuring: elephants)
Alrighty folks, that’ll do it for my monthly(ish) NFG roundup. As always, thank you for reading, and until next time: I see you, I appreciate you, and I sincerely hope you’re out there giving fewer, better fucks and living your best life!
Sarah
PS: Reminder that this thread in the new NFG Chat is where I’m taking suggestions for future posts. If you want to submit your own ideas and chat with me and other likeminded peeps on a private channel, you can upgrade to a paid sub—aka VIF (Very Important Fuckling) status—and join the conversation below.
RECENT POSTS YOU MAY HAVE MISSED:
I’ve traveled solo several times and loved it. Hope you have a great time in the Rockaways. Also, to be fair, Cheez-Its ARE manna from heaven.
Enjoy your retreat! And I am in complete agreement about Only Murders (Selena Gomez is wooden) and Death and Other Details (so much glamorous promise, squandered).